Furthermore, as implicit pyromaniacs with access to (arguably) crude alchemical skill, one could describe gajawomp cuisine as a series of seemingly terrible ideas that results in a few genuinely good choices.
If something explodes, catches fire, ferments unexpectedly or tastes incredible somehow that's just proof the meal had spirit or that the cook followed their heart.
Gajawomps don't really deal in recipes as much as an oral tradition of dishes that arise from their environments and surroundings, from one cooker to the next. Enough salt until it feels right, cook until nobody is nervous anymore, if it explodes cook it further away from the fire next time. That sort of nonsense.
In longterm settlements such as Stabville beneath Sunreach Hollow, gajawomps of the Swampwood Clan have even more outlandish dishes than what is presented below. They have a relative abundance of large spiders, bats, slimes and more to add to their usual culinary antics.
Ironically this produces a few dishes that curious and adventurous people quietly seek out. A miner might swear by ashcakes because they keep for weeks, bakers might pay handsomely for firehoney. An aristocrat with adventurous tastes might import lucky cheese despite the fact that half the shipment arrives inedible.
Boomroots
A starchy tuber with flammable gas pockets that whistle as it cooks. Gajawomps roast it beside the fire to vent the gas first, though impatient cooks occasionally launch one across camp or are launched themselves.
Powder Jerky
Unidentifiable flesh cured in salt, charcoal, bitter herbs and powdered sulphur, giving it a smoky, acrid flavour most people hate. Gajawomps barely notice and value it for keeping indefinitely in their bomb satchels.
Firehoney
Wild honey blended with hot peppers, resin and tree sap into a thick glaze. Every batch tastes different because no one ever measures anything, it's all by feel.
Charcoal Mush
A black porridge of burnt acorns, roasted mushrooms, roots, grain and whatever else gajawomps can lay hands on ground into a thick paste. Hideous to behold but surprisingly filling and nutritious.
Snapberries
Small red berries that build pressure as they ripen, popping underfoot or bursting pleasantly in the mouth. Gajawomp children delight in pelting one another with them.
Ashcakes
Dense flatbreads of coarse flour, rendered fat and ground insects, baked directly beneath campfire ashes. Gajawomps regularly forget where they buried them, leading to accidental "harvests" weeks later.
Scarecrow Stew
A greasy stew made from whatever has been acquired most recently, whether vegetables, livestock or less conventional ingredients. It is continually topped up and kept simmering for days, coincidentally warding off food poisoning.
Popping Fungus
A pale cave mushroom whose caps puff into light, airy morsels when heated. Young gajawomps compete to see whose launch highest from the pan.
Lucky Cheese
A semi-fermented 'cheese' inoculated with unpredictable moulds. Where do gajawomps get milk? What are they milking? What're you, an inquisitor? Most wheels spoil but the rare successful batch is considered a delicacy.
Sausage
Offal, blood, pungent vegetables and other scraps packed into intestines and smoked until nearly black. The heavy smoke preserves the meat and disguises whatever state it was in beforehand.
None of that sounds appetizing... someone needs to teach those poor dears how to cook... but then it would probably go wrong wouldn't it?
ReplyDeleteI'll have you know that many an adventurous palate considers gajawomp cuisine to be rather slept on. ;)
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