(This one was a reader request! Anyone with any requests can feel free to reach out!)
Pickpocktapuses, or pickpocktapi, are small to medium-sized octopoids with soft bodies, large eyes and eight flexible arms lined with suction cups. Their colouring changes readily to match stone, sand, weeds, wood, coral and so on, allowing them to remain nearly invisible while still.
Each arm ends in a small handlike formation with four fingers and an opposing thumb. These hands are disturbingly similar to those of a person and possess enough strength and control to open buckles, untie cords and remove objects from pockets without attracting notice.
The creature is highly intelligent and quick to learn. A Pickpocktapus that has once observed the opening of a latch or other close will usually require little instruction before attempting the same itself.
Pickpocktapuses inhabit tidal pools, coastal shallows, reefs and deeper water near seagrass beds. They favour rocky or sandy bottoms where narrow crevices provide secure dens. Most remain hidden during daylight and emerge when boats, swimmers, shoreline markets and other marks become active. Harbours with busy docks are particularly attractive as they provide food, discarded objects and a steady supply of stuff. Pickpocktapuses adore stuff.
Pickpocktapi feed upon shellfish, crabs, small fish and whatever edible matter they can remove from containers. Their hands allow them to pry open shells with unusual efficiency and to manipulate tools found nearby.
They also collect objects with no obvious use. Coins, rings, keys, buttons and gaming pieces are commonly found within their dens, arranged among shells and polished stones. Whether these items are chosen for value, shine or the inconvenience caused by their loss remains uncertain.
The species has earned its name through repeated theft and a general penchant for larcenous behaviour. A Pickpocktapus may anchor itself beneath a pier or boat, extend one or more arms above the water and remove small items while the owner remains unaware.
Several have been observed working together. One distracts the victim by splashing or tugging at clothing while another attends to the purse. Attempts to train them for theft have been made in many ports and prohibited in nearly as many. The principal difficulty is that a trained Pickpocktapus seldom distinguishes between its handler’s property and anyone else’s.
They may be caught with baited pots, strong nets or enclosed traps containing bright objects. Open baskets are unsuitable, as the animal will usually solve the matter before reaching shore. A captured specimen should be kept in a lidded container secured by more than one fastening. Knots, simple latches and loose stones are temporary objections at best.
The flesh resembles that of other octopoids and may be boiled, fried, grilled or added to soups and stews. It is firm, mildly sweet and requires tenderizing before cooking. The hands are considered a delicacy in several coastal societies. They are usually fried whole or simmered in spiced broth, though some diners find the resemblance to their own anatomy less than palatable.
Pickpocktapi have little lawful practical value beyond food and study. They do not normally attack people, though the beak can deliver a painful bite when the animal is cornered. The greater danger lies in lost keys, missing knives and opened containers aboard a waterfaring vessel.
Anyone encountering a Pickpocktapus should first secure all valuables and only then attempt to drive it away. A captured animal should be searched carefully before release, as swallowed coins are uncommon but concealed ones are not.
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Octopunchers are medium-sized octopoids with broad heads, large eyes and eight long arms lined with powerful suckers. Their colouring ranges from bright red and orange to mottled brown or green, allowing them to blend among coral, stone, weeds and other cover before striking.
The ends of the arms are unusually muscular and can be curled inward into tight knots resembling fists. An Octopuncher uses them to deliver rapid blows against fish, crabs and other prey, stunning or breaking them before consumption. The strikes are swift, accurate and considerably stronger than the animal’s soft body would suggest. Larger specimens have been observed cracking shells, breaking thin bone and knocking fish senseless with a single blow.
Octopunchers inhabit tidal pools, shallow coasts, reefs, seagrass beds and deeper rocky waters. They favour places with secure dens and open feeding grounds nearby, particularly crevices beneath stone or shells large enough to conceal their bodies. Most remain hidden until prey comes within reach, then extend one or two arms from cover and strike before the rest of the animal becomes visible.
Octopunchers feed upon fish, shellfish, crabs and other octopoids. They are patient hunters but unusually willing to pursue prey that resists them. The species is also strongly territorial; an Octopuncher may challenge another of similar size by raising its arms, changing colour and striking the water or nearby stone.
Unlike most octopoids, Octopunchers have been known to approach swimmers, divers and fishers who enter their territory. They appear especially likely to confront anyone carrying a spear, hook or other object that might reasonably be mistaken for a challenge. A specimen preparing to attack will usually darken in colour, spread its arms and strike nearby surfaces as a warning that should be taken quite seriously.
Octopunchers are caught with baited pots, heavy nets or spears aimed behind the head. Hooks are unreliable as the arms may seize the line and pull it apart before the animal is secured. A captured specimen should be stunned or killed promptly. Even outside the water the arms remain strong and may deliver repeated blows to hands, faces or anything else brought within reach.
The flesh is firm, rich and well suited to frying, grilling, braising or stewing. The heavily muscled arm tips are considered the best portion. They are commonly sliced, coated in garlic and breadcrumbs and fried until crisp. Slower cooking softens the thicker sections and allows them to absorb sauces and spices.
The arms should be tenderized before preparation. Beating them against stone is traditional, though some cooks object to the appearance of returning to the animal’s methods.
Octopunchers have little practical use beyond food and study. They are not generally fatal to people, though a blow from a large specimen may break fingers, split lips or render a swimmer briefly senseless.
Anyone confronted by an Octopuncher should retreat without striking back. A captured specimen should be kept away from the face and secured before any attempt is made to remove hooks or cut the arms.
